


Fighting

by MementoMoriPontifexMortis



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Gen, I'm really bad at tagging, I'm writing this on a 3DS, it's four in the morning and I only wrote this to see if I could write on my 3DS, mentions of multiple characters, none show up though, slightly OOC
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-25
Updated: 2014-06-25
Packaged: 2018-02-06 04:05:56
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,001
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1843711
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MementoMoriPontifexMortis/pseuds/MementoMoriPontifexMortis
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Estonia remembers the fights that had defined him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Only reason this is cut into chapters is because a Nintendo 3DS is a horrible writing tool, but its the only thing I had, so I give myself props.

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Estonia remembers the arguments the most. Even though they were few and far in between they existed, and they were memorable. 

The first fight he remembers is with Taani, who just spits fire in comparison to Estonia's harsh, cold words. That was probably the reason he cared so much about the other nation, because when they fought, it was like fighting a dragon; one with words that could scorch even his ice-cold behavior. Though they didn't fight often, Estonia opting to be on his best behavior for the first nation to hold his lands -- or so he tells himself, because admitting to having had a crush on the slightly older nation would be stupid and childish, and Eduard is anything but. 

The second fight that sticks out is right after his land has been sold by Taani to Prussia -- or well, the Teutonic Knights. No longer content with being cold and silent, Estonia starts to spew angry and hurtful words. He doesn't stop after Taani explains why or how he never wanted to, he continues right up to the day Prussia comes to take him away. That day he is cold and unresponsive to everyone. 

Prussia is the next person he fights with, and unlike being able to control himself like with Taani, every fiery word that Prussia yells get met with Estonia's own fierce vocabulary. They argued for days, leading up to Estonia refusing to eat anything. A week after that, he goes back to eating while Prussia smirks. It pissed Estonia off to no ends to utter the words, "You win." to the other nation. 

Prussia and him fought often, spewing the harshest words they knew at each other. Both too prideful to back down from the rise of a challenge. Even now, their 'friendship' is tentative at best and explosive at worst.

The next nation Estonia fights with is Lithuania, surpring even himself who expected to clash with Poland the most. Lithuania bugged him often when he went to live with them for that short while, and when Lithuania thought he could do a better job taking care of Latvia -- whom Estonia had taken under his wing while they lived with Prussia and Livonia -- he will admit to having lost it. At the time, Estonia had been feeling brotherly towards the younger nation and the thought of having someone else come along to take him away had set Estonia into a rage, and using years of anger that had barely ever got to make it's way to the top, Estonia had barraged the other nation with nasty words and false accusations. Lithuania argued back, fanning the flames of Estonia's figurative fire and they spent a month not talking to each other. Estonia also took it upon himself to try and make Lithuania feel horrible. 

Poland is the one who got them talking to each other again, calling them both foolhardy idiots. 

Estonia plays with his hands as he recalls the next fight, right after Sweden takes control of his and Latvia's land. He blames how tired he was of his land being played with and moving from nation to nation on this fight, but he also knows that he meant some of what was said. It was the night right before Sweden would get there to take them to his new land and him and Poland were the only two up, Latvia had roped Lithuania into telling him a bedtime story and Estonia hadn't been able to sleep because though this meant spending time with Finland, his longtime friend and language cousin, it also meant everything changing; having to learn a new language, a new religion, picking a new name to please the nation that now owned him (and don't get him started on how many names he has had!). 

He was angry and hurt and in his mind, at the time, all he could wonder was 'why didn't they fight hard enough?'. He thought they were happy, almost like a family, so why didn't they fight? Logically he knew they did, but emotionally, he didn't. Poland had tried to ask him if something was wrong, and everything had fallen apart after that. Even now, echoes of his words -- _"I hope you both suffer!", "I hate you both!"_ \-- continue in his mind sometimes. 

After that he goes back to being a quiet one, rarely talking and much more reserved. He likes to think that it was because Sweden scared him so, but he knows deep inside, it was because he hated who he became while arguing. He hated how the worst of him came out, and how he would use harsh, fiery words to cut deep. So he kept quiet, so quiet that sometimes he felt forgotten, but that wouldn't last long. He couldn't stay in the shadows for long.

Estonia had known that his time with Sweden and Finland would come to an end, all supposed good times did, and while he didn't suffer nor live with his people at the time, he knew of the growing power to the east of him, and knew that soon he would be living with that growing power. Most nations -- and people forget that Estonia was the first Baltic nation that Russia claimed. If it hadn't been his history, Estonia would have done the same.


	2. Chapter 2

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Since he is Russia's first Baltic nation, Estonia doesn't do much in terms of anything. He has drinks with the Russian at night before bed, prayers at dinnertime -- even though he is a staunch non-believer -- and breakfast early. After Mr. Russia goes to work, all he really does is a bare minimum of chores and learn the Cyrillic language as best as he could. 

Russia smiles though at everything he did, thanking him for a clean kitchen one day and for tidying up the library another. Soon, Estonia starts to clean -- just to hear that small amount of praise. Now, don't get it twisted, and start thinking that he wanted to be there, but he had long since learned that it was his lot in life to be passed from nation to nation and he was willing to try and make the best out of a situation. 

Though, Estonia frowns often while there, wondering what happened with the other Baltics, knowing they were in ugly revolts against the on-coming Russian rule, Russia explains what was going on. And even if he knew it was probably propaganda, he accepted the words as though they were truths. 

But the peace between him and Russia did not last. After both his Baltic siblings had lost their respective battles (Latvia first, then Lithuania), he had expected to see them right away and when they did not come, Estonia questions Russia. That is his first mistake. 

The argument almost becomes physical more than once, and Estonia had barely gotten a word in edgewise. Russia sent him to his room without supper and Estonia insulted Russia's God. Later that night, right before Estonia went to sleep, Russia knocked on his door to apologize. That night, after Russia's explanation, Estonia decided that Russia was slightly insane and only wanted him to stay meek and mild. And if that's what he wanted, then Estonia would do just that. After that Estonia doesn't question Russia, instead he explains to every newcomer what is expected of them. (It caused rifts between him and them, but whatever keeps him safer, he doesn't care). He makes sure to never take his own peoples side and knows that it was weak of him to do that -- throw his people under a bus, but he also knows that they never saw the side that he did. They never pissed off a sleeping dragon -- and not even the fiery kind that Taani had been, just an ice cold one with the power to destroy all in its path. He gets comfortable there, pushing down emotion until one day he can't do it anymore. His and Russia's next argument happens after Estonia has been asking for freedom, his people have been revolting and Russia's royal family is in turmoil. It gets physical but Estonia walks away with his freedom and even though he has two bruises on his face, he gets to go home. When he goes back to the place he called home, Estonia is often visited by Russia in the weeks after all the turmoil has died down. Estonia doesn't know why but it chills him down to the bone because he isn't Russia's favorite like Lithuania is, and he isn't fun to mess with like Latvia, so in his mind there is no reason to visit. That caused yet another fight between them, Russia screaming about how ungrateful he was, how he should be thankful for Russia's kindness. Russia stopped visiting after that, causing Estonia to realize that having another person near him killed the emptiness that occurred sometimes. And for a while Estonia can ignore the world, and he doesn't raise his voice once during his freedom time. But it doesn't last and soon the world wars hit, soon all it seemed like he was doing was raising his voice in anger and soon he was back in the room he lived in with Russia.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last chapter because seriously, a 3DS is a bad writing tool, cause you can only write 886 words per chapter for some odd reason!! {º_º}
> 
> Also it's like 4 a.m. and I'm dead tired trying to write on a scren that's really tiny, so any and all mistakes are my own and I take full responsibility for them; including any tense problems.

←♪♪♪♪♪♪♪→

Once Estonia moved back to that house all he does is silently argue. Nothing enough to reach the ears of the one nation he had come to hate (it was more a mix of emotions, for he felt bad for the Russian who just wanted a family), but enough that Hungary, his other language cousin asks him if he's alright. He had been an asshole to her, shooed her away so he could wallow in his problems alone. No one else tried to talk to him, to angry at how he had been their first meeting or too wrapped up in their own problems. 

Everyone cleans though and it scares him because that used to be his thing and Russia honestly never cared about a clean home. But since everyone else is cleaning Estonia didn't. 

That caused arguments between him and other nations, prompting them to wonder why he didn't have to clean. At the time, those arguments are what kept him alive. Soon though they aren't enough, so Estonia goes on and pokes the sleeping ice-dragon, in need of something to make him feel as though life is more than just pretty flowers from the corner of his eye and going back and forth from nation to nation, dreaming for freedom. 

Over the course of six months, Estonia gets into four fights with Russia, three with Hungary, and 16 with both Lithuania and Latvia. 

He only stops when he became overwhelmed with emotions he wasn't used to feeling. Being so used to hiding emotions, he couldn't deal with the onslaught and overnight, he changed his behavior. Going back to reserved helped. It takes some explanations to those ties he tried to cut, how he felt lost, but soon he had fixed almost every relationship, all except for one. 

He had tried to fix his and Russia's relationship -- even now he was doing so, why else would he be sitting in a cafe in Moscow if he didn't want to try -- but those arguments cut deep holes and his storming out in 1988 didn't help either. That was their last argument, Estonia feeling patriotic and his people planning the Singing Revolution, it couldn't be helped. It was a huge blowout argument, leading to Estonia rushing to his room to pack what little he had and then walking out of Russia's home for good. (It was hard hiding out from Russia's men for the next few years but it was worth it in the end). 

That was the last fight that really defined Estonia as a person and a nation, other than that all his arguments were political, and though they were important, they had yet to truly define him or show him something about himself that he didn't already know.

←♪♪♪♪♪♪→  
ΤΗΕ ΕΝD  
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**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ☆aka until I come back to revise because I hardly doubt it's any good right now☆


End file.
